Morrissey Announces Smiths Reunion, Denounces Vegetarianism

It was just a few weeks ago that Morrissey was having a rough patch. He cancelled concert dates due to health concerns and is currently on bed rest. He also feuded with late night host Jimmy Kimmel, cancelling his appearance on the show in protest of being on the same bill as the cast of Duck Dynasty (due to his staunch vegetarian views).

But things seem to looking up; he announced last week that he will be playing summer tour dates in Mexico and South America.

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But nothing could prepare for today’s announcement; after years of denying it would ever happen, he seems to have buried the hatchet with his former band members, announcing the reunion of The Smiths.

What’s even more curious though is that during the press conference he was seen sipping from a cup from burger chain ‘In-N-Out Burger.

When questioned why he frequented a restaurant that is diametrically opposed to his views, he said offhandedly: ‘What do you think? You only live once. I’m burnt out on my diet, which has been restricted as of late. I’ll elaborate no more.’

This all seems incredulous, but Johnny Marr announced via twitter that he was on board with the reunion.

Given the timing of this announcement, it seems unlikely that the band will be doing any of the big summer festivals like Lollapalooza. He announced no official tour dates, or new album plans, simply saying in his inimitable styleI’m just sick of people asking, so here it is, shut up and enjoy. I’ll play the whore for once, as much as it pains me. Besides we can all use the money!”

Click here to read the full announcement on The Smiths Reunion.

 

 

 

 

 Or, if you’re too lazy to click; APRIL FOOLS!

Sorry, I couldn’t resist!  Perhaps there’s a remote chance The Smith’s will reunite at some point, but not today. But I don’t think you’ll ever see Moz and IN-N-Outburger in the same sentence ever again!

I’ll leave you with a Smith’s song that fits the occasion:

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